Chapter Four: Coffee Shop Guy

This next story is actually NOT about a guy I met online... We will call this one Ben. Ben the Barista - that's right, not only did I meet this guy in coffee shop, I met him behind the counter. Oddly enough, I actually had a crush on a different guy working in that particular establishment. I was a regular there, and I thought Ben was cute, but thought I liked this other guy a little more. I went in with a ploy to talk to him, chickened out, and somehow ended up with an offer from Ben to take me out instead. Since I lacked the confidence to make a move with the other one, I said yes - and besides, I really did think Ben was pretty cute too, so it wasn't a total loss. Or so I thought.

I agreed to meet Ben at his place so we could walk to a bar within "stumbling distance" for drinks... Looking back, this might already have been a red flag, but I was pretty excited to FINALLY hang out with a guy from my favorite coffee shop after crushing on several of them over the years, so I overlooked it. When I got there, however, there were a few things that I could not overlook. In a matter of minutes, my exciting date with a mysterious coffee barista became something very different.

First, he decided that he would rather have drinks at his house than at the bar... Okay, I thought. That's fine, right? Maybe he just wants to be able to talk.

Second, he informed me that he lived with his parents (uh oh) and that they were incredibly religious, so we would have to drink outside. In the park.
So we'll be one with nature - what's wrong with that? I must have really liked this guy.

Third, he casually slipped his ex-wife into conversation. I didn't know he had been married, or even how old he was, though I finally asked and found out that he was 28.

RECAP: 28, wanted to drink in the park, lived with parents, divorced. Was also a little stoned.


Should I have run for the hills? Yes.  Did I? No.

We had a couple of glasses of wine, talked a little about his marriage and the coffee shop (his only source of income, hence the living at home) and then he proceeded to show me his "art." Some of it was pretty good, and some of it was naked ladies. The naked ladies were not necessarily my cup of tea, but to each his own right? We talked for a little bit more after that and then I finally went home, a little dazed that the evening had gone SO differently than I had pictured it. Needless to say, I did not hang out with Ben the Barista after that. He asked, but I said that I was looking for something more serious and didn't want to tie him down so soon in his newly single state... Somewhat true, although mostly I just couldn't really see us having a future together. Can you blame me?